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Thunder lightning or in rain

29.06.03 @ 22:43
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Finally I have peace and quiet and time to myself, with out mom, or my son. I don't know what it is about me, but sometimes I just get in moods where I want to be alone. I don't want anyone around me, to to talk to me or get close to me. It usually doesn't last that long, and its usually when I am at my most stressed.

Warren is developing an attitude lately that is even worse than usual. Somedays I would just like to sell him to a circus or something. Then he turns around and does something so sweet. I swear if he was a girl, I would be stocking up on feminine supplies, because he acts just like someone having a monster case of PMS. Of course my mom is rather old fashioned, so that mouthyness just doesn't go over at all. Tonight when he was taking a bath, I walked in an he was listening to some group, called Saliva. I am not familiar with them, but the music reminded me of someone who jumped in a bathtub with his mike. Maybe its just me, or maybe I am just old, but I seem to recall even the metal bands of my day actually played something resembling music.

I spent all of Friday night, catching winks between coughing fits. My inhaler helped, but it only helped so much. It doesn't help that I have a week bladder since having Warren. And the Tegretol has a side effect of dry mouth. So I am drinking all the time, and afraid to be more than ten feet from a toilet. (whine whine, sob sob). I fell alseep Friday, until I was woke by the phone. I over slept and didnt' get Mom. Ooops. Forunatley the traffic is nil in Fargo that time of night.

Saturday we did some shopping, and Sunday we just hung around, except for a trip to Walmart. Tommorrow I have to work. (Major bummer) and then before Mom has to leave, her friend Ann invited us out to dinner.

I talked to the lady from G***M***, but I'm not sure how well the phone screening went. I am crossing my fingers, but not holding my breath. I also got a call Friday from **B***. Its a Customer Service position, but if it pays more than this, I am going for it, unless they have no benifits. My bigget fear right now, is taking another job only to have it turn out worse than this one. With the economy the way it is right now, the thought of being unemployed is pretty scary. So is the thought of being stuck in a dead end, miserable job I hate. But I think the thought of no job is even scarier. Especially with all the bills I have, and an ex who regaards child support as a means of getting back at him, and that I'm somehow gaining benifit if I use it for luxeries like electricty and food. Stupid brainless twit. I didn't get pregnant alone, neither of us was held to sex against our will, yet I am the one raising the child and handling all the responsiblity, and he is the one who wants to be 16 forever. Not that I am bitter or anything. (yeah right). And its not like I have seen a child support check since I can't remember when, because that requires working a regular job and being responsible, and that cuts in to the hang around doing as you feel like time. Okay enough of that rant. I guess being rather extremely short of gunds has me a bit worried and stressed. Very stressed and no chocolate ice cream in site. What is a woman to do..?

At least it didn't rain today, for once. Over 12 hours with out rain, maybe miracles really do happen.


Prequels ~ Sequels

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~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
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~ Bleech ~

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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.