*Odd Googles
*About Me
*Photo Albums
*Make My Day
*My Linkers


*Adagio Teas
*Kasora Teas
*Lissa Explains
*1000 Journals
*Free Words
*20 Questions

Have you seen Leanna Warner?
Click on photo for more details.

Click for West Fargo, North Dakota Forecast

Recently shared thoughts

"Suicide is Painless"

2001-05-16 @ 10:50 p.m.
View my Guestbook
Free Guestbooks by

Copyright 1969 Lyrics by Mark Altman Music by Johnny Mandel

Through early morning fog I see visions of the things to be the pains that are withheld for me I realize and I can see...


That suicide is painless It brings on many changes and I can take or leave it if I please. I try to find a way to make all our little joys relate without that ever-present hate but now I know that it's too late, and...


The game of life is hard to play I'm gonna lose it anyway The losing card I'll someday lay so this is all I have to say.


The only way to win is cheat And lay it down before I'm beat and to another give my seat for that's the only painless feat.


The sword of time will pierce our skins It doesn't hurt when it begins But as it works its way on in The pain grows stronger, watch it grin, but...


A brave man once requested me to answer questions that are key "is it to be or not to be" and I replied "oh why ask me?"'Cause suicide is painless it brings on many changes and I can take or leave it if I please....and you can do the same thing if you choose

Today was another long stresful day.. I almost had a complete freak down when I saw a cop, and then the cop did a turn around and I thought I was being followed but they never stopped me.. now I am paranoid.. was I just being warned, or was something totally else going on.. I wonder if there is such a thing as policiphobia, fear of the law.. LOL...

Warren had some tough spots in his day today.. but he is such a sweet wonderful kid.. I feel like such a failure as a mother sometimes.. Do you know what he did today. We stopped for gas at the Cenex station and there was greenhouse set up in the same lot (the 45th street adn 9th ave Cenex if your in the FM area..) I told him I wasn't going to buy any flowers today.. but he had some money he saved and he said he wanted to buy something for me.. so I said he could .. that little sweety spent his dollar on a four pack of Marigolds that he said were for me.. I could have just cried.. is that the sweetest thing or what.. as soon as we got home we had to transplant them.. LOL and water them..

Some times he makes me want to check my self in the rubber room then he is soo sweet I just want to hug him to death.. I think he feels soo guilty about the way he acts sometimes.. I know it is mostly beyond his control but sometimes it is more than I can handle.. *sigh..

But the real topper for my day was one of those stupid magazine people that take No as an excues to go into super sales mode.. arggg what part of I dont have any damn money dont they understand.. I am very close to putting up a sign on my door that says.. "Any one selling religion, magazines, or any thing else that is not profiting a LOCAL charity such as cub scouts or area school DO NOT EVEN BOTHER!! I have no money, I already know God, and I donate only to charites that dont' bug the $**** out of me.. thank you.. " This DOES NOT apply to Schwanz.!!I mean its one thing when the cub scouts sell popcorn or candy or the cheerleades need money but these for profits and religious pushers just make me wish I had a really big mean looking dog I could have come to the door!!! LOL..

Toodles for now..


the melancholy Holly


Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass:
Thankful For:
Music of the mind: :

~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~

Layout copyright Me, Myself and I. Correct viewing of this site requires IE 5.0 or higher. Use of any other browser may result in unintended results.(Netscape 4.0 or higher is passable however I haven't yet been able to get it to look right in Firefox)

All contents, (except graphics) unless otherwise specified, are the property of TheCrankyOne. Please ask permission before using. Person's caught using pics of my son without permission will be severely dealth with. Graphics are courtesty of Full Moon Graphics. If you want to use them, ask Kitty not me..

Also this is my diary and if you don't like what you read, then I suggest you move on to another diary. I do not write to please others, I write for myself. If you don't like my diary it is your problem, not mine.
Any rude comments, spam, flames etc.. will be deleted as soon as I become aware of them. Also if you wish to comment please have the decency to leave a valid form of contact such as a web address or email, unless I happen to know you and would know who you are.

This Web site is Registered with

Creative Commons 

/> This work is licensed
under a Creative Commons License.


In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.