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Chilhood is wasted on the young

09.07.02 @ 03:32
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The virue and value of childhood seems to be wasted on kids. They have no idea what a luxury they have, and how important it is. It is only when one is an adult that suddenly the value of being able to play and imagine and not have to worry about those annoying things like bills and taxes becomes so clear. Kids spend the largest part of thier childhood trying to growup, sometimes it seems as fast as possible, too fast. Then once we grow up and spend some time being reluctant adults we start to once again long for the innocence and exuberance of childhood. Only then it is too late. We had our chance and it is gone.

Tonight my son showed me once again, that he is determined to grow up whether I like it or not. He and his friends decided to go riding to the Amoco for treats. Not the Cenex tht is close to here, but the one that is over a mile away. He knew I wouldn't let him, so he lied to me. He only admitted the truth when he came back with soda and candy. I was floored.

My son is able to handle riding that far. Was he safe? Did he cross at the light, and wait for the walk to light up. Did he pay attention? What if there was a pedophile, what if he got lost? I didnt' know they had gone there, he told me he was going to the garage sale at the end of the block? Yet part of me is also proud that he was able to do it. And sad. Sad because my little boy needs me less and less to do things.

He is nine, yet when I look at him part of me stills see's tha tlittle bundle the nurse handed me. Congratulations its a boy. He's all yours. Talk about scary. I still see that wided eyed little boy who could run down the aisles well before his first birthday. Running away from me, while I chased after. I could still see that scared three year old on his first day of pre school, worried about not having mom there. I see the little boy who not all that long ago was just learning to ride a bike and sign his name. Now he is going down the street with his friends, no moms to buy stuff once again he is leaving me.

I remember when I was nine. Nine was the year I stayed at my friend Melissa's house so we could go to the late (9pm) showing of Grease. I remember walking home and feeling so grown up. (it was the late 70's in ND in a town with a pop of 1500, my parents weren't as nutty as they sound). I remember how grown up I felt. I look back and cant' believe my mom let me do it. That she let me go to a movie that late and be out with no adults at that hour. I look at Grease and cant' believe my mom let a nine year old go.

The thought of letting Warren do these things scares the pants of me. He is so full of excitment and wonder. He doesnt' know how dangerous the world can be. And I am not ready for him to find out.


Prequels ~ Sequels

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~*~Have you read these~*~

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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.