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I complained because I had no shoes until met a man with no feet.

25.03.03 @ 21:55
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I was a naughty girl today. My appt with Warren's therapist was cancelled because Warren was in school today, and the therapist was out sick anyway. I didn't find this out until lunch time, and since I was already approved to leave early, I just kept that little fact to myself and left early anyway. F-Word it all. I could barely keep my eyes open long enough to make sure I was actually typing the correct orders in the computer. (AS 400 dbases suck big giant sour flavored rocks!!) THis was after a ton of caffiene and ginsing. So I left as if I actually had my appointment.

I didn't have much of a mental health break though. The high point was finally getting the dead wieght (no not Mike, he's still an albatross) cut off my hair. I thought for sure they would have to cut more off, than they did, but it actually feels like hair again at the end instead of dead grass. I was able to wash it tonight, with out the drain looking like someone tried to drown a big ugly rat. I love it. It wasn't my usual place of beauty, but it was close, the price was right and I needed it done weeks ago. So I just did it. I still have massive greyage, so I look like a human zebra from the top of my head. I want to get another dye job, but then I think maybe I'll do something a little more drastic. Lately I have this strange urge to just do something wild, like dye it a lovely shade of purple or something. NOt a wild bright purple, but a lovely subdued purpleyish shade. Since only some of the hairs are gray, I could get and interesting effect.

Then I stopped at the grocery store, where crackhead bag boys hang out getting high on cough syrup, and walked the mile and half home. (it was nice and I REALLY need the exercise). I made supper for Warren and I, and when I was cleaning the plates off to do the dishes, (or rather pile them in hot soapy water so I could go enjoy one hour of the last 8 weeks of Buffy.) I looked in my garbage can and realized there was more food here soon to be in land fill then what many people in the world (including some here in the US), get to eat in a week.

Except for Buffy, the night was pretty much downhill from there. $12.00 for a haircut? In many countries that is a month's wages for someone working 40 hours a week, so I can have cheap made discount crap in my house. (And we wonder why so many people hate Americans). I am poor by most standards in this country. I live paycheck to paycheck barely scrapping by each month, and yet compared to a large section of the world I am quite wealthy. My son has warm clothes, is getting an education and is being treated for his illness. He is able to ride his bike around, and play outside with little fear of violence or attack. (though that may soon change.) I have a job, a house, and the right to speak my opinion without being thrown in jail (unless of course they decide to repeal the Constitution in the name of homeland security. **rolls eyes**). Compared to the Average American I have didly, yet compared to my counter parts in Iraq or Afganistan or any other third world country I am quite wealthy and spoiled rotten.

When I worked at CW, one of my coworkers and her husband were immigrants from Romania. They had been here many years, had worked hard, saved and built up a pretty good life. They were very Americanized and generally lived the same way as the rest of us. When her family finally got permission to come visit, she was thrilled. They took one look at the amount of food at a single meal, and couldn't believe that was ONE meal. For them back home that was enough food for two or three days. They were wide eyed and in REAL awe, because they simply could not believe the amount of conspicous consumption (they didn't use those words but..) that goes on here, or the fact that most people here don't even think twice about it. They prefer to bury there head in the sand and live under the idea that the rest of the world has it as well. They buy there over priced designer duds made by some under paid mother in a sweat shop over seas, and then wonder why other countries hate Americans so much. Beauty is not the only thing in the eye of the beholder.

Shutting up now, lest I stick my foot in my mouth after shooting it off.

"I may despise what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."


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~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.