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January Lipservice

07.01.02 @ 10:32
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January Lipservice: Write about broken promises. A time when someone broke a promise to you or when you broke a promise to someone else.

Such a simple question, with a not so simple answer. There have been many occasions of broken promisees in my life. Most of them, fortunately were of the " oops was I suppose pick you up?" varitety. I or they would be mad for awhile, then life would move on. Unfortunaltly sometimes broken promises are not so easy to fix. My ex promised at the beginning of our relationship, when I found out I was pregnant, that he would take care of me and Warren and that his family would come first. Unfortuately beer and pot were jealous masters and made sure they took his time away from us.

Instead of going to work so that I could continue to stay home and take care of my son, he would work a job for a littel while then get on the outs with some one and either quit or get fired. There were under the table jobs, and odd jobs and we managed somehow to always squeak by.

Yet things were not as planned or promised. When Warren was one, I wound up getting a job. We divided childcare so Warren would always have a parent, and I worked nights so I still got to be there in the morning when he woke up, and I got to spend most of the day with him. But I missed putting him to bed and giving him his bath and snuggling with him. I was still nursing somewhat so if he would wake up I got to snuggle and nurse him back to sleep, but it wasnt' the same. I was torn. I was glad for some time away but work wasnt' fun and my son still came first.

Then Mike started getting worse and his behavior continued to decline. Things would go thru a honeymoon period for awhile, then something bad would happen and the anxiety would increase adn the drinking would increase and the volcano would once again errupt. He had promised to do the right thing and take care of us, yet we spent almost 10 years together, he never once wanted anything to do with the idea of marriage (a blessing in diguise as it turns out).

When it finally came to and end I had to go to court to sever the ties and to get child support. With out the state he would not pay. He still sees his son, but instead of a father he often acts more like a big brother. I was promised the American dream, but it was in reality nothing more than a lie. It was the largest broken promise in a pile of broken promises.

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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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