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Butt flavored mouthwash

Wednesday, Nov. 23, 2005 @ 2:09 pm
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Nothing starts a 4 day weekend off right like getting to go home early. I'm free until Monday morning. More like semi free. My mom/brother's train comes in tonight/tommorrow morning at 4am (how'd we get so lucky). My house is a disaster, and I keep thinking of things I need to get/do. It's gonna be a long weekend. It will be great to see my family, I just wish I could do it with out all the pressure.

Sometimes things that start out looking like they are going to be bad end up being not bad (and sadly the opposite can also be true). Last night Warren and Jasper were wrestling around and acting like hyper goofy teenagers. Than Warren started yelling, his foot hurt. His toenail was definately showing signs of starting to be ingrown, and he was limping and having trouble putting his shoe one. He said he hurt like hell if it was touched or he tried to walk on it. He wanted to see a doctor. So being a dutiful (and somewhat guilty) parent I headed him off to the walk in clinic. Getting there we notice almost no cars in the lot, so I was thinking "Great we can get in and out of here fast", as it was 8pm already. We get to the door, and wouldn't you know they changed the bloody damn hours on us. They close at 8pm now, instead of 9pm. So we hop back in the car, where the clock is proudly proclaiming the time to be 8:01 pm, no shitting you. Apparently they take their hours very seriously. Warren is still in massive toe pain, so it is off to the ER for us. Where else would a tired stressed out single mom want to spend a Tuesday night?

Barely do we get down Broadway, when Warren is looking up out the window and yelling "Wow COOL LOOK MOM!!". Over the business comming off one of the local bank buildings is one of the coolest Fireworks displays I've seen in a long time. Warren quickly forgot about his foot as the blocked off roads meant we had to find another way around to the ER (I realize this only fully makes sense to people familiar with Fargo, but it still works). Warren wanted to find a place to park so we could go watch the fireworks. We parked, of all places, in front of the building where his dad was living when we first started dating, and where Warren was concieved. Ironically the place has since been condemed. I think that says a lot about many things.

We walked down to find a place to watch, but as soon as we got a good place the fireworks ended. It was only when I read the paper today, that I realized we had ended up in the end of the annual Santa Claus/city light up parade. Most places do this after Turkey day, I guess Fargo wants to be different.

After the excitement was over, we made our way finally to the ER. Where amazingly despite at least two ambulence calls were were in and out in about an hour and a half. Warren's toenail wasn't bad enough to need pulling, however the doctor (who amazingly enough was also named Warren and seemed impressed that there was somebody Warren's age with that name), did raise it up with some cotton so it wasn't irritating his toe, and trimmed it off. We were sent home with a prescription for Ibruprofen 600, which I may not fill as Warren doesn't seem to be in much pain anymore. And instructions to soak it in warm soapy water a few times a day.

Warren was pretty nervous, going in as he was afraid they were going to have to pull his toenail (which happend to my dad once, many years ago), and that it would hurt. Instead the procedure was almost totally pain free and he got to watch a cool fireworks display too. If it hadn't been for his bad toe, we wouldn't have got to see the cool pyrotechnics. I pointed this out to Warren, he admitted he never thought of it that way. I think I gave him something to think about.

I finally used that mouthwash last night. "may cause changes in taste of food" should really be altered to read, may cause everything to have the taste of butt. You would think something that is blue and smells minty, would not taste like licking dirty underwear (not that I have any idea what that would really taste like-I'm mearly being literay in a disgusting sort of way). On the other hand, if they ever market it to dogs, they have a great marketing campaign. "Fluffy will love our mouthrinse, it taste's just like Fido next door".

Now if you will excuse me, I need to find a few more excuses to keep from getting anything done.


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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.