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This I know is true...mostly

Thursday, Jun. 23, 2005 @ 12:43 pm
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1. Bras were not designed for women with sunburns..ouch ouch...ouch..Warren and I both look like the main course at a lobster boil

2. One size does not fit all, in fact it rarely fits any. With the wide combination of hieghts, weights and body types among the human population why do manufacturers even bother. There is now way a tall skinny woman and a short fat one are going to be able to fit into the same size.

3. They may be called boy-cut shorts, but they only look good on girls with very feminine bodies. On my body they are incredibly uncomfortable

4. If you can't find something, it is probably in the one place you would never think of looking, which is usually the most obvious place, right under your nose (or butt) and when you find it you will feel incredibly stupid.

5. The healthier something is for you the worse it will taste, and the worse it is for your health the more you will like it. (if chocolate and broccoli could reverse nutrition we'd all be in perfect health.

6. The further away the bathroom is, the more desperately you will need to use it.

7. It is possible for a pair of $3 flip flops from Wally World to be more comforable than a pair of $50 shoes from some department store

8. Teens and pre-teens have selective hearing and will be able to hear what you don't want them to from a mile away, while a request to clean up the house can be yelled from 2 feet away and they will still look at you like you are not even in the room.

9. The fastest way to triple your possesions is to state in a loud voice, "we will start moving next week". Trust me the amount of items you own will triple if not quadruple in number.

10. You can't argue with stupid people, as logic only works on people who can think logically, so there is no point in arguing with somebody who has none. It makes as much sense as asking a blind person if your socks match. this especially applies when arguing with people over the internet.

11. Anybody who drives slower than you is a moron, and anybody who drives faster is a stupid ass (with thank to George Carlin)

Add your own..

And just for some fun:
What animal are you? Take the test!
What smilie are you? Take the test!

Job Searchers Lingo (what they really mean)

"COMPETITIVE SALARY" We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY" We have no time to train you.

"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE" We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up.

"MUST BE DEADLINE-ORIENTED" You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED" Some time each night and some time each weekend.

"DUTIES WILL VARY" Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL" We have no quality control.

"CAREER-MINDED" Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

"APPLY IN PERSON" If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE" We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE" You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST" You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos.

"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS" You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS" Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.

I'll have to keep that in mind when I am cruising through the want ads.


Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass: I couldn't find my wallet today, turns out I was sitting on the damn thing..
Thankful For: my son gave up swimming with his friends for dr. appt and didn't pitch a fit
Music of the mind: : Out there having fun.. in the warm California sun (okay ND sun, but that ain't how the song goes)

~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~

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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.