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Have you seen Leanna Warner?
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Can you tell me how to get, h ow to get to Stress-Me-Out Street

Friday, May. 06, 2005 @ 8:44 am
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Can all 5 be named Lucky?

Click on the caption for the full story. Every once in a while my local paper suprises me by running a front page story that doesn't involve somebody doing something inhumane to somebody else. After the last couple of days I've been having I really needed to read a sweet human interest story with a happy ending. Something about that little gray kitty made me wanna just reach thru the paper and scoop him up, hug him and never let him go, (though I think as a healthy kitten he might not appreciate the gesture), as I am a sucker for calico's and for tabbys.

Warren is having a lot of ups and downs right now.Tuesday he started out bad and then turned it around.

Wednesday was a very hard day for him and it was so hard to visit him when he was in such a depressed state. It isn't normal for my son to be so clingy to me, and so huggy. He was teary or on the verge of tears the whole night. He was also sleepy due to the new medication (which was a shot this time, though in the future if he takes it, would be a pill and thus not so dramatic on the system). He kept saysing he didn't know what he would do if I wasn't there, and how he is so lonely. That was also the day he wound up on a behavioral contract, which in a nutshell means he has to earn his way out of his room.

Thur he had a much better day, but when he came down for our family therapy visit he kept begging me to check him out, though he still had his humor about it.

But Thursday night (last night as of this typing), he became more insistant and bargaining about my checking him out. I could tell he wasn't just kidding around either as he was alternating between mad and sad. I really wish I could check him out, but I just dont' think the "real world" is a place he is fully ready to handle. Right now he is willing to promise anything and I do mean anything. I know he means it with all of his heart, but I'm afraid it is a case of his mouth writing a check the rest of him will be unable to cash.

I don't want to set him up for failure, and after the discussions I've had with his principal who is a caring and well meaning person who has done a lot for Warren but clearly just doesn't totally understand him at all, I really don't want him back in that school system the rest of this year if I can help it. He's been thru enough, and they are talking alternate programming. Well there are only about 3 weeks or less left of this year, and it is bad enough he is missing the class trip to Bismarck (which he was so completely looking forward to), that I don't want to put him thru anymore.

He started out the year so well. He hated taking meds, but I made sure he got them anyway. Than about a month ago, I thought he was still doing well, and his doctor (pdoc the one with the MD), decided that since he was worried about weight and was doing fairly well, that would could stop the Abilify (in anticipation of a new med), but that was a very bad idea. With in a couple weeks of the stopping (and right as we were going on trip) all hell broke loose in him, and suddenly he was a very angry, disrepectful, back talking, refusing to cooperate child, who wouldnt' work (expect at home for me, because I wouldn't let him not work), and who would change moods fast than a light switch going on and off. Of course when the school found out this, they blamed me, for not telling them so they could tell me. But they have habit of not telling me everything unless I ask the right questions I only get the total picture, not the details. So niether of us got the full story until it was blowing up in our faces.

And his when I tried to explain how Warren feels about the school and the authority figures there from his point of view. I didn't say he was right, only that I can see why he would feel that way, and that if I were in his shoes I would feel the same way. Not a good plan. Mr. H was pleasant enough, but clearly he took it as a personal attack. He is a good person, but he has no idea what it is like to be my son. I know they don't hate him, but they do see him differently. Yes he has trouble, and yes I totally agree his behavior was completely unacceptable, but he is not a bad kid. He is not a troublemaker, or a future felon. He is a very good kid, a sweet kid, a kid who gets along fine with other kids, who is very kind, and can be very polite, a kid who would never dream of hurting an animal (in fact sometimes I think he would prefer animals to people), a kid who in discussions about drugs and alcohol points out how he would never do such things because of what they have done to his dad (who by the way is back in jail again and now looking at going away for over a year - yup I can really pick them can't I), a kid who when he is having a good days talks about being a mechanic or an engineer and who has the skills to make it happen, if he is willing to work. He is also very polite outside of school and medical institutions. He is a good kid, who has mental health issues, but because of how his problems are displayed I sometimes feel like one of the few people who can see that. (**Insert screams of frustration here**)

Oh and just to make sure my hell is comlete, my landlord decided it would be a good idea to rip up the front lawn and my former garden area (along with the other people in the 4 plex) and replace it all with cement. I like the idea of a large patio and easier care, but dammt I was planning to grow some tomatos in that space, and maybe some flowers in the other space. Right now it is just a big mess. And of course he "couldn't find my phone number" so I wasn't informed until right before construction started.. (**insert more screams of frustation**)

But at least the kitties are safe and happy.

For shits and grins:

Your Birthdate: August 10
Your birth on the 10th day of the month adds a tone of independence and extra energy to your life. The number 1 energy suggest more executive ability and leadership qualities than you path may have indicated. A birthday on the 10th of any month gives greater will power and self-confidence, and very often a rather original approach. This 1 energy may diminish your ability and desire to handle details, preferring instead to paint with a broad brush. You are sensitive, but your feeling stay somewhat repressed. You have a compelling manner that can be dominating in many situations.

Amazingly fairly close to the mark..mostly..

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Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass:
Thankful For: rescued kitties make me feel better
Music of the mind: : "Cause I don't know who I am.....don't know..."

~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~






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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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