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Welcome to the Church of the Dollar

Wednesday, Jan. 19, 2005 @ 9:47 am
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I would love to thank whoever googled me for They Should Be Shot. I needed the laugh, I have no idea what you were really looking for, though I have quite a few suggestions that could apply, not that I am advocating actually shooting anybody in the real sense, purely in the metaphorical. At least that is what I will tell the cops when they knock on my door asking about my EX, the RatBastard or RB for short. First the man can't show up, now he's like a hemmoroid that won't go away no matter how much Preperation H, you cover it with, it just keeps burning your ass.

In the good news department, Warren has started back to his old school. Even though it is only mornings for now, he is thrilled. Yesterday was the first day and it went very well. His favorite part, naturally, was recess. But that is because the boys are playing football, and they all want him on the team (the kid is built like a pre-teen quarterback), as he is the largest and strongest and no one can get past him. He loves it. I just hope this doesn't mean that he will join the football team when he gets to middle school or high school (although if he was really good that would solve the problem of how to pay for college if he decides to go), but if he does decide to play, let's hope I have a job with great medical insurance. I am so proud of him, he has made amazing strides and worked his butt of this year in school. It makes me so sad, that now that his dad has decided to re-enter the picture, and we are fighting so it makes him so sad, and he says it gives him a headache. I know it is tearing him apart. He is starting to say he doesn't care again, and that tears my heart out.

Next week is moving week. V & S ( the old tennants and long time acquantances/friends of mine)are moving out Monday (this comming, not previous), cleaning Tuesday and checking out Wednesday. Which means I can start moving stuff in Wednesday evening/all day Thursday. I haven't even barely started to pack, I have so much crap it is hard to even know where to begin. I know alot of stuff will have to go. I'm so going to miss this place, and yet I am glad for the chance to start over. I am sure Warren has mixed emotions about it as well, he has lived in this house since he was 4, almost 5 years old, and he is now 11 almost 12 years old. That would be hard for anyone, even if we are moving only a mile or so away.

Yesterday I also learned a valuable lesson about answering want ads that seem a little "too good to be true". In this case it was a "help wanted" ad, that wasn't exactly. It turned out to be one of the wierdest experiences that I have had, in regaards to "job interviews".

I should explain, that the ad looked a little fishey to begin with. "$x (a relatively high number for entry level)per month, no experience neccessary..blah blah.." which should have been first clue. But curious, and greedy little bastard that I am, I decided to check it out, the worst that could happen is I waste some time.

The first phone call was a tip off, I had to call several times to get somebody, as the message I was getting otherwise basically said, this is Xcompany personell, if you are calling about job offer do not leave a message just keep calling, which sounded totally fishy, but by then I was curious, so I kept calling and eventually got a live person. The phone screening lasted about 4 minutes, in the process I mentioned that I had a 11 year old son which limited my ability to do nights and weekends. The next thing the guy asked me, was if I was over 18? HUH?? If I'm not over 18, but I have an 11 year old son, than I must've been the most popular kid in my kindergarten class, not to mention I think the Nat'l Inquirer would have financed my college education.. Sheesh people think!!

The call was at 10:30 and they told me they were interviewing people at 12 (and that they were looking for people to start tommorrow tip off number 2), if they made it thru the 2nd interview later that day (tip off number 3). By then I was suspicious but curious. I arrive to the first interview, which wasn't even at a company office, like one would expect but at a hotel conference room which was just down the road. I went in, went to the conference room, where there were several other people sitting at tables, filling out what appeared to be a standard job application. After about 15 minutes or so, a man came in and gave us a brief talk about the company and what the 'job' entailed. Then he had us turn in our job applications one by one and interviewed each of us for about 5 minutes or so, and told us to call back to his cell number between 3-3:30 to find out if we were to come back for a second interview. Being the suspicous yet curious person I am I purposely filled out my job application incompletely and a little less than professinally.

Remarkabley I was "selected" to come back for a "2nd interview". This interview was supposed to be about 2 hour or so. This is the part where it goes from the merely weird to the totally surreal. I have been at Amway parties and other MLM (pyramid) "parties" before, so I am familiar with the concept and what they are about. This however was like that, but on crack. There was supposedly no investment, and a guaranteed income but we didn't get to that part till later. (along with the no sales required even though your income is determined by sales? I was going HUH?? also)/

This second interview was also a group affair. We were all sitting on chairs (no tables this time), in a semi circle in the same small conference center with no ventilation (did I mention it was next to the pool), the heat and humidity in the room was enough to steam broccoli. After waiting what seemed forever watching some really bizaare movie on HBO, the head honcho (manager what ever he wants to be called) finally came in, and started in with this long speech we were supposed to take notes on (again with the HUH??). But instead of a normal welcome to Company X, this is what we were about, it was more like a televangelist for the Church of the Almighty Dollar (can I get a Ching-ching from the Choir please). It was an hour plus speil on how money isn't evil and how great it is to be rich and do what you want, and how working for a living at a J.O.B. (just over broke), is the devils idea of torture and so on. Then he had everybody go around and talk about thier current job ( or lack there of), and what they want in an ideal job (Can I get a witness to the Great and Mightly Greenbacked ONE!!)of course this was just more fuel and a way to get everybody all charged up (Can I get another Ching-Ching from the Congregation please). Clearly this guy is the bastard love child of Jimmy Swaggart and Donald Trump. Then after and hour of why being rich is so wonderful and being aggressive and money-hungry (Thou shalt be a greedy pig who sacrifices family time, to make a buck)are qualities to strive for, then after getting everybody all frenzied up, they finally introduce the "products" .

The products involved are an air purifier and a fancy-schmancey vacuum cleaner (that resemebled a giant computer mouse). Then they proceed to go thru the whole product demonstration speil (kneel at the alter of the great Silver Goddess), pulling out every sales trick in the book that you have probably ever seen on any vacuum commercial. By this time it is well past the two hours and I am starting to worry about Warren who would be expecting me back and who had homework and needed dinner. But I felt trapped. Finally then they get back to the money worship and cut to the chase. I am still trying to figure out how a job with no sales, has pay that can be dependant and increased by sales.. (Commandment of illogic #1, confuse them by making no sense, but sounding like it makes perfect sense). By this time I just want to get the freak out of there. Those of us who didn't hear from them last night were supposed to show up for training at 10am this morning. UM yeah, I'm going to ditch a guarantted paycheck I've had for two years for some fishy door to door, home show vacuum outfit? I didn't fall off the potato truck that recently.

Did I mention that by the time I got home, Warren was so worried he tried to make his own dinner, forgot the pan was on (wanted grilled cheese) and had the house all smokey, and was waiting outside for me. Of course Mike had to come over and use it as the perfect opportunity for how evil of a mother I really am. I just felt enourmous guilt from hell. Damn stupid ad, and damn stupid me.


Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass: People who place misleading ads, even though I knew it was fishy
Thankful For: My son is safe and healthy and fine, and I didn't fall for their "job" offer
Music of the mind: : damn Full House theme

~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~

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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.