*Make My Day
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Too much perfume hurts my stomach
Apparently once upon a time in a previous life (if you believe in that sort of thing), I must have royally pissed somebody off. My belt is still off the van, and the battery is more or less one hiccup away from needing funeral services. If it doesn't start tommorrow, somebody named me will be walking 6 blocks and taking the bus until payday when she forks over $60 to straighten some metal pieces and put a rubber belt back where it belongs.
Meanwhile I had to send Warren out on his bike to get milk as we can't seem to keep it in this house, more than about 5 minutes. It no sooner hits the refrigerator and it seems to poof. While its not a mystery where it goes, the mystery of which one of my son's legs is the hollow one, does still remain a mystery to this day as everytime I ask him he points to a different leg. However if calcium makes strong bones, I can vouch that this kid must have an adamantium skeleton by now.
And since that wasn't quite enough to make my day a complete disaster, we also ran out of toilet paper but didn't realize it until 8pm. Since the van was still auto-none-go-a. We decided to walk to Cheep Foods, after all its toilet paper, its not like we are going to eat it or anything, just shit on it and flush it. So we head off with the only transporation we have, those ugly things on the bottom of our ankles. Only to discover that Cheep Foods was closed. But the Cenex is just across the road and we have to have TP. So we head over there, since I had to go by this time anyway. My life is nothing if not full of irony. We pay for a big old roll of Scotts single ply tissue, and then I run back to the ladies room which was occupado when I first came in.
OMG I have never in my life peeded and left a bathroom so fast. Ladies please if you have to use the bathroom and are unfortunate enough to be stuck with some very smelly body functions, please please please turn on the fan, or use the air freshner thing or leave the door open. Please I am begging you what ever you do, DO NOT try to cover it up with cheap perfume.. The people who use it after you, and are able to keep their dinner inside of them will be eternally grateful. There are some smells that do not mix. I feel sorry for which ever poor employee has to clean up that bathroom. I couldn 't totally contain myself. The sink was too far away, I'm too classy to puke on the floor, and I had to go too bad to use the toilet lest I piss on the floor like some stoned out drunk, so I did the only thing I could and ended up hawking into the garbage can adn making a run for the door so I could get some fresh air.
It was a slow night so there was only one other woman in the store and I am pretty sure she is the guily party. She was somewhat well dressed and that that high falutin air of some one who isn't quite as wealthy as she would like people to think she is. I don't think she heard me moaning and whining to my son about some people, but if she did maybe she will get the message. My GAWD, I've smelt green fuzzy fish that wasn't that bad. Even the flies were running with tears on thier eyes screaming get me out of here. My stomach is still kinda woozy.. And that isn't the first time its happened in that bathroom. They really really need to get some better ventilation in that bathroom, the air should not be green..
But I leave you with a good laugh.. I found this website thru a fellow diarylander. I will warn you, if you are a Rebublican or rightwing you may not appreciate the humor, but as an admitted liberal I found some of them especially hilarious. My favorite: America: One Nation under Surveilance.
However since I have friends on all sides of the political spectrum I'll keep most of my political beliefs quiet unless asked.
Prequels ~ Sequels
Music of the mind: :
~*~Have you read these~*~
~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~
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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.
I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.
I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.