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But I'm not ready for him to grow up.. not yet

Sunday, Jun. 13, 2004 @ 1:22 pm
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my sleepy boy
Collage of pictures I took of my son this morning while he was sleeping, or should I say trying to sleep.
~*~Evil Mommy~*~

2 o'clock on Sunday afternoon and I am still wearing the same pj's I put on before going to bed on Friday night. Yeah, I'm sure I smell that wonderful too, lord knows I look it. I made a half hearted stab at cleaning up the disaster area we call a kitchen. I say half hearted, because while I did find the sink and eliminate that lovely road kill in the desert sun smell comming from it, walking across the floor is still an exercise in dodging landmines, thanks largely in part to Warren's legos (the kind with motors and such).

I also managed to strip my bed and flip the mattress around. Now I just need to get the sheets and so forth in the laundry, which is currently washing a load of assorted miscellaneous that was laying on the laundry room floor. Warren promised to do the living room if I took him for an Icee last night. I'm still waiting. I have a feeling unless I "remind" him, I may be waiting a long time.

I guess that's typical of 11 year olds. I'm sure I'll find out this year. I can't believe next Sunday will mark 11 years since they handed me that little red headed screaming bundle and congratulated me on being a mom. I'm not ready to deal with adolescence from the mother side, for crying out loud I'm 35 and still have more or less the same hair cut I had when I was 13. If that doesnt' say someting, I don't know what does.

Speaking of hair, I am seriously considering doing some thing radically different. I just don't know what. I mean I've had this basic hair cut, save a few perms, and numerous dye jobs, for over 20 years. I think it is finally time that I am ready for a change. I just don't know what. I don't think I am ready to have short hair just yet, but I am tired of dealing with the mane I have. I want something extremely low maintence. I mean anything over two minutes to be ready to leave and its too much work for me. I need wash and go, cause I am just sooo not the girly kind of girl. I've had a curling iron for 15 years and it still looks as pristine now as it did when I took it out of the box.

And while a small part of it, might be that my mom has been after me to get a short "old lady" hair cut since I can remember, torquing my mom's chain is only part of it. I feel naked with out my hair. And I am also thinking about coloring again, but more radical. Like a deep red red. A because I like being different, but also because I know that will get a reaction out of my mom, and a few other older people I know. I guess being 35 (well okay I'll be 35 in 58 days but still), isn't too old to enjoy messing with your mom's head as much as you did when you were 15. I shouldn't but its just so easy, and just so much fun, cause she falls for it, and gets all "mom-ey" so easily. Now I just need ideas. I have hair that is currently about bra strap length, fine hair, but a lot of it. I have a huge main of fine hair. I also have some very badly cut bangs (hide the scissors - please!!). Maybe I'll get it done in time for Warren's birthday party, kind of a milestone marker. I'm not a new young mom anymore. I'm an experience mom, on her way to a new phase in life. My son is crossing from childhood to adolescence. I am approaching the entrance ramp to middle age. When my Grandmother V was my age, she was on her 10th kid with number 11 on the way. (or there abouts, I don't know the exact math) So things could be worse.

Monday is the start of summer school, and only one of us is looking foreward to it. Unfortunately it isn't the one who will be sitting in the classroom. Since its at a different school, than the one he normally attends (till next year, but that's another story)and its way on the other side of town from us, he will be riding the bus. But the bus will come at 8:22am. I have to be to work at 8:30 am. I have a 5 mile drive to work. As you can see, somebody is going to get his first taste of making sure he catches the bus with nobody there to make sure he watches and gets his but out the door on time. This should be an intersting learning experience for both of us. I am sure he will do fine, but part of me still thinks, he's too little and he needs somebody to watch him adn make sure he gets on. I can't help but have nightmares about him missing the bus adn being stuck at home, where he has too much fun and the school gets on my case for not sending him.

As you can see, I am quite new at this whole letting your kid grow up and start fraying the apron strings thing. He's ready to burn them, I still want to reinforce them and make sure they are tied extra tight. Well part of me does, but another part of me, is very ready to loosen them a bit. Ready to be able to go places with out an hour of planning, to go places without taking him along. I am so ready for a bit more freedom, that I couldn't have when he was little and needed 24x7 supervision. I think by the time he is ready to get behind the wheel of a car, I'll need to be medicated - heavily.

I still need to tell him that he'll be going to a different school this fall, and that he will be in a different classroom. I kinda mentioned the idea with out getting into details and he was not pleased at all. I know I have to tell him and the sooner the better, but I am just not ready for his reaction. I know he will be crushed and angry, even though in the long run its better for him, and will do alot to help him. I have a couple months yet, I don't want to ruin his summer, as he is already mad that I am making him go to summer school, and "ruining my whole summer". I am the evil mom, who makes him work on his reading skills when he would rather be at the pool working on his sun tan and his diving skills. If you hear a loud temper fit comming from this direction, you'll know why.


I have added a few new features, including a comments section, a trackback, a countdown for Celebration III (Star Wars con in Indianapolis), a moon phase applet, and a current readers count). Check them out. I think I have all the bugs worked out, but I want to make sure. My comments doesn't match my site yet, because I can't edit the actual html, and I'm very new to CSS, and still working out the kinks on that one. If anybody knows alot about it, and wants to volunteer help, hey I'm not too proud to beg.


If you have problems with diary eating your entries, another trick I've learned is: Before clicking submit right click on the entry and select copy. That way if D*land gets hungry you can try again. You will loose any extra fields you have but at least the entry will still be on your clipboard, without the bother of opening word (which can mess with html) or notepad.


Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass: None for today
Thankful For: Three weekends off in a row - due to asking for Warren's bd weekend off
Music of the mind: : Queen ~ We will, we will .....ROCK YOU!!!!!

~*~Have you read these~*~

~ Ode to a child who is no more ~
~ She's baaack ~
~ testing ~
~ Facebook me ~
~ Bleech ~

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In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.