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Have you seen Leanna Warner?
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Lets here it for Smart Women.

23.02.02 @ 12:07
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I stole this from my friend Lauren, who doesn't want to be linked (she is on Livejournal), but I think it is hilarious and makes a point.

A couple went on a vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife liked to read.

One morning the husband returned after several hours of fishing and decided to take a short nap. Although she wasn't familiar with the lake, the wife decided to take the boat. She rowed out a short distance, anchored, and returned to reading her book.

Along came a conservation officer in his boat. He pulled up along side her and said, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading my book," she replied as she thought to herself, "Duh--- isn't it obvious?"

You're in a restricted fishing area," he informed her.

"But officer, I'm not fishing. Can't you see that?"

"Yes Ma'am, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with rape," snapped the irate woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," groused the officer.

"Yes, that's true," she replied. "But you have all the equipment."

MORAL OF THIS STORY:
Never argue with a woman who knows how to read. It's likely she can also think!!

Last night was a night I needed for a long time. Warren and I went out to Perkins for dinner. At first we were going to go to TGI Friday's but one look at the wait and we quickly changed our minds. At first I thought Perkins was going to be a disaster. Warren has decided that he will never order from a kids menu again, because "all they have is like cafeteria food Mom!". So he has to have a grown up menu. No problem right. Well when you are a 2nd grader with a barely 2nd grade reading level it is a slight problem, because it means mom gets the job of reading the whole menu to you while you can't make up your mind, because they don't put pictures of everything and you want to know what it looks like first. He had finally agreed to Chicken Strips, but I was going to ask (big mistake) about Shrimp which he also loves. Before I could finish my sentence the waitress came. I gave her my order (cod fish, I forgot Lent earlier but by God I remembered it later. I am such a so so Catholic girl), then we were going to give her Warren's order.

But because I had been interupted he had a fit. "What were you going to ask me mom, what were you going to say??". Except that I had forgotten what I was saying. This proceeded to throw him in to a fit of frustration, and me with it. I was a tad stressed last night. In the middle of the fit I just told them to give him the strips with the fries and the mac and cheese as I knew these were things he would normally eat. Of course by this time he was totally incoherent and I was slowly going there myself. (ODD is not fun at times let me tell you.. I have enough trouble keeping myself together.). It got so bad I thought for a minute we were going to be asked to leave. Fortunately fate smiled and Warren (and I) managed to get ourselves under control. We actually had a nice dinner the rest of the night. Warren and I had a great conversation and I got all the lastest juicy bits of 2nd grade gossip, including who cheats at what games in phy ed.

After dinner we went to Barnes and Noble and met up with my friend Calthea. I finally have my copy of Echoes!! Mucho thankyness!! She was actually happy to see me, as apperently some wierdo guy had been bugging her. We had a great time. We had a soda and Warren proceeded to teach us "his" version of Chess. This was a riot, neither one of us had ever played the game before, and Warren decided this was a good time to make up some rules. He also loved to change sides and just wanted to capture as many pieces as possible even if it meant a few slightly illegal moves. Later we found a Chess book, and attempted to 'play by the rules' but Warren was having more fun acting silly and trying to get us to capture each other's pieces. I think both of us were in silly moods, but it felt good to laugh. Warren was being a silly, but adorable (and just slightly obnoxious) little rugrat. He was also thrilled to sell another candy bar. Of course he talked me into buying him a $15 world map and a $5 box of magnetic words. At least he likes educational items. Spoiled brat!! (he's my one and only what can I say).

Right now I am at work for anther half hour or so, till R* comes up. Warren has been pretty good. Right now he is playing bookshelf and loving it. He got tired of playing atomica and Bejewled and this at least keeps him out of the vending machines.

Tonight I am definately cleaning out that bathroom, (maybe). I just cleaned like a lunatic downstairs not that long ago, and it already looks like a dump again. I need to do dishes, laundry (my 2nd least favorite), and vacuum. (I could have Warren do that, but he liks it a little too much, and I don't need it vacuumed for 45 minutes straight.).

I finally saw the AOTC (SW EPII) issue of Vanity Fair. I didn't buy it though. The pictures were super, but not much there, nothng frameable or worth saving. I absolutely LOVEPadme's dress on the cover. It is soo beatiful and has a lovely Renaisance feel to it. She has such gorgeous dresses. Even better than Leias, and I guarantee we won't see Natalie in any tin bikini's. I also think the picture of Ewan (as Obi-Wan) in the robe with his beard was positively YUMMY, but not worth the price of the magazine. I am also highly pissed that the stupid sexist twits put it in the Men's interset section. Um Excuse me, 40% of the fan base and growing. My friends and I are not men!! I resent that. When will people learn. I would have moved them, if I didn't think they would freak on me. Normally they put the sci-fi movie mags between the men's mags with scantily clad anorexics, and the guitar mags with painted faces and scantily clad anorexics. Is it that hard to create a new section??.

Only 20 minutes to go, then I am soo out of here.

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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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