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Lovable, cranky, farsighted little monster.

21.05.03 @ 19:27
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I am so tired of long intersting days. I had today off work to take Warren to his appointments all day. He started out the day fine, but when we got to his first appointments, he Jekylled in to Hyde jr. He suddenly reverted back to being cranky, and oppositional and surely and generally very unpleasant to be around, and very anger inducing. This was not good. Dr. J (his therapist), isn't sure what to think. He has mostly good days at home but there have been a few moments that have not been so good, moments where I have lost my cool. I am not sure what we are doing at this point. Dr. J thinks it might make a difference to also try a new therapist, as Warren for some reason seems to have developed problems with Dr. J. (mainly because he is a take no BS kind of guy). Warren is still doing good in school, but getting him to take his meds has evolved into an all out war.

He takes the clonodine fine, but hates the risperdal because it makes him sleepy. Fair enough I don't like feeling sleepy and druggy all day, but he would say I gave it to him when I know I didn't. Today we also met with his Pdoc, Dr. G (and his intern). We are going to try switing his meds around a bit, so he takes more at night when he is going to go to sleep anyway, and less in the morning. (I am crossing my fingers and toes it works). I still had to battle with him tonight, but not as much. I feel so terrible, I mean sometimes I have to hid it in a PB&J or something to get it in him.

When he takes it, then he is much better. He still has problems but they are more managable. I hope the changes work. I think it will also make a big difference to have Mike out of the way. (his "comments" about meds and me are only fueling this fire). I think the changes will be good, Warren is already asleep now, often times I have to fight to get him to go to bed at 9:30 or 10. I think the extra hours of sleep will go along way to helping him be much more mellow and not so cranky.

In other news, the inevitable finally happened. Warren got fitted for his first pair of glasses today. The frames he wanted aren't in, in his size and when they tried to order them, they were on back order, so they are going to give him a loaner pair till then. He only needs them for reading, as he, unlike me, is farsighted rather than nearsighted. So he will only need them in class for reading etc.. He looks so studious, and scholoraly in them. Especially the way he had his hair spiked. (If I was a 9 year old girl, I'd be going huba huba). I think that might help with the reading at school too. I am willing to bet that the fact that small print is hard for him, and gives him headaches expaines a lot about his seeming sudden dislike for books. He has the same eyes as my Grandfather. Everyone in our family winds up with glasses. (Even Mike who is too vain/poor/uninsured to get his that he needs.) My brother and I have had them since we were kids, so have my (late) dad and my aunt. My mom got hers in her 40's. Almost all my aunts and uncles have glasses. So it was only a matter of when not if. But most of us are nearsighted. My mom and (late) dad had bifocals. I only hav single vision. But I still remember when I first got them and discoverd that it wasn't Mr. S's writing that was to small and far away, it was my eyes. And I no longer had headaches everyday after school. Warren also has a lot of headaches. I am so glad I made that eye doctor appt. I am usually quite paranoid, and very anal about eye doctors ect.. my grandmother went blind from glaucoma, and I am convinced that it contributed toward her decline. She also had arterialscoloris, but from what I remember and what I've been told (I was very young at the time), once she lost her eyesight, she pretty much gave up on everything she liked, and since my grandfather was already deceased, she pretty much just stopped taking part in life, and she soon slid downward and soon became unable to care for herself. The thought of that ever happening to me, scares the shit out of me.

Now I just have to puzzle out, who is going to take care of him while I work alternate weekends. He thinks he could handle it alone, however I know (and state law also says) that he is too young to be home alone. I also need to find out the details on summer school. Hopefully between the glasses and the remedial aid, his reading will finally catch up to grade level, and eventually to his intellectual level. His decoding skills are sorely lacking behind his comprehension, and verbal language skills. And now I think we have one small clue why.

Its hard to be angry at him for very long, as soon as we were out of the appointment, he was back to sweet lovable Warren. On the way home he was talking about how his feet ache (he also got new shoes, as the old ones were toast), but when we got home. "I can get a foot massage from my wonderful mommy who loves me so much". Now how can you stay mad at that?

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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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