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People are strange

Tuesday, May. 30, 2006 @ 7:52 pm
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People are strange when youre a stranger
Faces look ugly when youre alone
Women seem wicked when youre unwanted
Streets are uneven when youre down
When youre strange
Faces come out of the rain
When youre strange
No one remembers your name

What a day. I got to talk to Baby Man again. For those of you who don't remember he is a cust we have at work, who I've only talked to once before. Believe me that was more than enough, I'll never be able to hear the name D**** J******, or B**** ?? again, with out a laugh and some nausea. Anyway this particular customer is into the adult as baby sex thing (yes it really exists) and DJ, is his "Mommy". Only she is "allowed" to order. But he likes to call and test to see if he is "allowed" to order. Because of all the "issues" with this customer we are no longer able to take his orders (he likes to order adult diapers). When he gets turned down, he also acts like a child (think 5 year old not getting a cookie), and whine that she "never lets him do anything". Today he actually behaved himself, but the last thing I need is to be part of some adults freaky kink fantasy.

Last night Warren and I had a go round because he pitched a fit that we were out of BBQ sauce I had made my homemade, better than any restaurant chicken fingers. I ended up losing my temper because in the heat of it, I could have sworn I heard him say something that he denies saying. Or more correctly I only heard him say part of it. I thought he said "because you are dumb', and he insists he said "but NOT because you are dumb". I hate it when I react like that. Usually I have much better control of myself. We made up and all was well, but I still feel mom guilt, which ranks right up there with priest induced Catholic guilt, only I've managed to mostly recover from 12 years of CCD induced guilt. (for those who didn't have the pleasure to grow up Catholic, we get lots of guilt beacause apparently thinking about doing something is almost as bad as actually doing it. I have lots of "bad thoughts".

Random thought for the day, when you call home and can no longer tell for sure if the voice on the other end belongs to your ex or your son, it is quite unnerving. I can handle Warren's new voice in person, but on the phone it is quite unnerving. My little boy doesn't sound like a boy anymore. **sniff**

I had another intersting comment today. One of my coworkers asked me about my weight loss and remarked that she could really tell, especially in my face. HUH!! Just call me Charlie Brown. I never thought of my face as that chubby, though if I had my hair up I did have a bit of a moon face to me. Don't get me wrong, I love all the comments and questions, I love how all of a sudden people at work are asking me advice on weightloss (no magic pills just lots of fruits veggies and exercise and time amoung other things), but I look in the mirror I can't see the difference. My clothes fit much better, I have a lot more energy and I feel better, but when I look in the mirror I can't see that much of a differnce. I'm sure I just have a bad case of fun house vision, but I really wish I could learn to not be so judgemental about what I see. I also wish I could eat bell peppers with out after effects that offend all in the same room as me. But if I keep at it, eventually I can change my insides to match my outsides.

People are strange when youre a stranger
Faces look ugly when youre alone
Women seem wicked when youre unwanted
Streets are uneven when youre down
When youre strange
Faces come out of the rain
When youre strange
No one remembers your name

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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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