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Valley Con & Google Jokes

Tuesday, Oct. 26, 2004 @ 12:56 pm
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I would have posted this Sunday, but by the time I got home I was so tired I could barely keep my eyes open long enough to take a bath. I tried checking my email, but I didn't get past the first message before I was drooling on my keyboard, like a fool. It took until this morning for me to recover from this weekend. That is what happens when I get together with a bunch of other geeky types, and drink more in one weekend than I have in the last two years combined. Jawa's may look somewhat harmless, but they have a helluva kickback. I had two Jawa Juices on Friday night (okay it was really just Rum and hot cider but hey, this was from the Star Wars con suite). I ended up in the pool with some friends playing drunk volleyball with Space Balls: The Beach Ball. It was a much needed vacation.

Saturday was a blast. I was tired but soon got over that. The guy doing the science demonstrations on safer alternatives to combustible fuels (static electricity and other things), and also on robotics was a hoot. Warren loved him, and I got to show off my medusa look by standing in front of the group fondling a Van Degraaf Generator. Warren loved playing with the robots (okay Lego Mindstorm and one optical controled one). My favorite panels however had to be Terry Brooks (who sat behind me with his wife, during Dr. Ben Bova's first presentation), and then when Terry Brooks and Ben Bova did two panels one on Science Fiction/Fantasy and one on writing. I also have several books autographed by both. I can honestly tell you they are two of the sweetest gentlemen I have met. Terry signed 5 books for me, happily. And even with a line going forever was happy to talk to me and my friend Stacy about writing and getting in the field. I can't remember what he wrote in each book, but each one was different and personalized. Both have gone out of thier way to earn a huge amount of respect. Not only are they gifted in thier respective fields, but they have the decency to be wonderful human beings as well.

Unlike Boris Vallejo and Julie Bell, who have lost a lot of respect for many fans here, when they caled from Minneapolis of all places (a 4 hour drive) and said "they were canceling because they were tired". A family emergency or something we could understand, that happens, but just cause you didn't feel like it, after plans have been made, people were expecting you, and fans were waiting. That is just wrong. I can honestly say I have lost whatever respect I had for them, and unless something dramatic happens to change my mind, they will never see a single penny from me, no matter how talented they are.

Luckily Dean Hagland was back again this year (with his parents, as he is originally a Winnepeg-er). He did a great job of filling in for them, in addition to his own stuff. His comedy show once again rocked the house. I'm not even and X-Philes fan, but he made me a fan of his. There were also a couple of guys from Farscape, (Lani Tupu and Wayne with the last name I can't spell and am too lazy to look up), who were wonderul to the fans. I will post pics later, once I get them.

I won't go in to detail on every panel, but I had a great time, and met some wonderful people. There were some awesome con suites, and I went way over board Saturday night with the liquid Schwartz (think Space Balls). Thankfully I had eaten good at the Banquet or I would have been a real mess. As it was 4 Schwartzes in one night and I was up partying until 4am. At least this year there was no 5 am fire alarm as security was watching for it, but since the idiots who think its funny every year couldn't get to the firealarms, they decided to do something really stupid and call in a phony bomb threat, at 3 am. The cops and our security people knew it was a stupid prank, but not instead of being in minor trouble for a dumb prank they are in serious trouble. But nobody had to clear out the hotel, and most people didn't even know about it till later Sunday.

But Saturday was definately the hightlight. If you can picture a hotel full of very drunken Sci Fi/Fantasy/horror/video/Ren Fest types. All quite wasted and all having quite the time. Though when the couple plus one decided to hope in the pool fully dressed, and go from drunked volleyball, to activities one would normally only conduct behind closed doors, things got beyond interesting. But over all it was a blast.

I was good this year and only bought a few books, and Warren only got a couple of small crystals, and a gorgous dragon on a crystal statue and a freaky but cool skull with a snake comming out of the eye. (remember where we were).

I can't wait until next year, Kevin Sorbo, possibly R.A Salvatore, and fingers crossed possibly Dan Brown. I am geek, I am strong, I am proud...

I have the jokes that were sent for my last entry. I only have four right now, and instead of picking one best one I am going to post them all here, as they were all quite funny in different ways.

Ok, here's mine. A Cardassion and a Wookie were in a bar. The Wookie had to use the bathroom after eating 12 pounds of egg fu yung and 3 pounds of KFC. The Wookie was in there for about 35 minutes and finally came out. She smell surrounding him was so bad the people in the bar were gagging.

As the Wookie passed the Cardassian going back to his seat, the Cardassian noticed something brown hanging from the fur of the Wookies backside.

�Hey Wookie, what�s that?�

The Wookie reached around with his hand and pulled the brown wad back in front of him.

�Ooops, looks like a little Klingon.�
By CosmicCrayola

A Klingon, A Cardassian, and a Wookie? Think Jeopardy, as in a form of a question: Who is Bush, Kerry and Nader.
By Awittykitty

Here are mine, for quick reference ...

Q: How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb?
A: A Klingon would never dishonor himself by deigning to perform such a remedial task. And it is a good day for darkness.

Q. How many Cardassians does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just one, but he has to steal it from the Bajorans.

Q. How many Wookiees does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Droids don't pull burnt-out light bulbs out of their sockets when they lose. Wookiees are known to do that.

By GolfWidow

A Wookie goes into a dentists office, and patiently waits for his bi-annual cleaning. Suddenly, the Cardassian receptionist looks at him, turns an odd shade of grey, and runs to the facilities to lose her lunch.
Somewhat shocked and offended, but ever the considerate Wookie, he offers to sit on the other side of the lobby where she can't see him.

"No, no, it's fine, it's not you. Please, stay where you are." 15 minutes later, the same thing happens. The poor Wookie insists that he can find a less conspicuous spot so as not to offend the Cardassians delicate sensibilities.
"No, really, it's not your fault."

10 minutes later, the Cardassians eyes start to water, and the Wookie stands up in a huff. He starts to walk out the door, when she says, "Wait! Please! It's not you! It's the Klingon flossing his teeth with your fur!"
By Hammie

So which one do you like?

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Prequels ~ Sequels

Daily Dumbass: Idiots who thought bomb threats were funny
Thankful For: A great relaxing weekend, with some wonderful people
Music of the mind: : Tahamora by Tri-Destiny (they played this weekend)

~*~Have you read these~*~

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Mini-Bio

In every neighborhood there is at least one house that all the neighbors gossip about. This is a diary from the woman who lives in that house. I am a single mother in her mid thirties. I live in North Dakota with my son, Warren.

I tend to be a bit of a slob, and am the opposite of a girly-girl. I am geek girl, who loves Star Wars, Star Trek, Harry Potter, Buffy, Angel, action movies, science fiction, action adventure, Dr. Who, and so on and so on.

I love to write and while I don't post much fiction online anymore I would love to be a writer someday. I am also overweight, bipolar and suffer from allergy induced asthma.

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